{"id":11,"date":"2011-11-04T03:25:57","date_gmt":"2011-11-04T03:25:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/3c2586e2-b99c-4fe8-8657-4a75dca08777"},"modified":"2011-11-04T03:25:57","modified_gmt":"2011-11-04T03:25:57","slug":"where-did-i-leave-my-sht","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11","title":{"rendered":"Where did I leave my Sh!t?"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

Dudes. I\u2019d like to think I\u2019m fairly normal. Okay. Normal enough<\/em>. But there are days where I would lose my effin\u2019 head if it wasn\u2019t attached to my effin’ body. I put my keys down on the table, I turned around\u2026and those suckers were frickin\u2019 gone<\/em>. So after tearing ass through the house. I found them.<\/font><\/p>\n

In the refrigerator<\/em><\/strong>. <\/font><\/p>\n

Oh, and that\u2019s just incident number one<\/strong>. So later, I\u2019m at work. You know. Working<\/em>. And then I\u2019m taking off for lunch and I\u2019m trying to find my phone because I\u2019m addicted to it and I can\u2019t even have a meal without it. Don’t judge. You know you do it, too.<\/em> And I\u2019m getting all bothered and pissed that I can’t find it. Then I realize….<\/font><\/p>\n

It\u2019s in my hand<\/em><\/strong>. <\/font><\/p>\n

And the clincher? I was actually talking<\/em> on it at the time.<\/font><\/p>\n

I think my mind completely forgot that\u2019s what a phone is actually for. Kind of like how fast food restaurants forget that they are supposed to serve food\u2026and then things like the McGriddle are born. Granted, I loves me a McGriddle. But that isn\u2019t food, at best, it\u2019s a food substitute. A freakin\u2019 delicious maple-y food substitute. Great<\/em>. Now I\u2019m hungry. This happens every time I watch “Super Size Me”… I always want to go get a Big Mac. <\/font><\/p>\n

But let me get to incident number two<\/strong>, which involves the weather. I hate it when it\u2019s cold in the morning and then hot in the afternoon. I\u2019m talking \u201cjacket weather\u201d cold. Which I wear IN to the office and then forget to take OUT of the office. Then by the end of the week, I got, like, 4 jackets at the office and then I end up freezing my ass off on Friday because I\u2019ve run out of jackets. And then I got to lug 4 jackets home from the office, and the security guard is giving me the stink-eye because I look like some crazy jacket thief. Not that I care about the stink-eye. Brass balls over here, brass balls. <\/em><\/font><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve actually had to start leaving a little note on my computer to remind me to take my jacket home. Like some crazy Alzheimer\u2019s patient. I would put a reminder on my phone. <\/font><\/p>\n

If I could find the damn thing. <\/font><\/p>\n

It\u2019s probably in the refrigerator. <\/font><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dudes. I’d like to think I’m fairly normal. Okay. Normal enough. But there are days where I would lose my effin’ head if it wasn’t attached to my effin’ body. I put my keys down on the table, I turned around…and those suckers were frickin’ gone. So after tearing ass through the house. I found … Continue reading Where did I leave my Sh!t?<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nWhere did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Where did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Dudes. I’d like to think I’m fairly normal. Okay. Normal enough. But there are days where I would lose my effin’ head if it wasn’t attached to my effin’ body. I put my keys down on the table, I turned around…and those suckers were frickin’ gone. So after tearing ass through the house. I found … Continue reading Where did I leave my Sh!t? →\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Trendables\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/images.quickblogcast.com\/7\/8\/5\/2\/3\/141704-132587\/lostandfound0.jpg?a=20\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"trend76ables\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"trend76ables\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/\",\"name\":\"Trendables\",\"description\":\"Bite-sized pieces of my mind\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11\",\"name\":\"Where did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/0b7ff358b01386db762262bca35109d6\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Where did I leave my Sh!t?\"}]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/0b7ff358b01386db762262bca35109d6\",\"name\":\"trend76ables\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1139cbbc9c76c818c558d356d8d6ca6eb8c8061a54de5a7d8f19c9c21ec72411?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1139cbbc9c76c818c558d356d8d6ca6eb8c8061a54de5a7d8f19c9c21ec72411?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"trend76ables\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?author=1\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Where did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Where did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables","og_description":"Dudes. I’d like to think I’m fairly normal. Okay. Normal enough. But there are days where I would lose my effin’ head if it wasn’t attached to my effin’ body. I put my keys down on the table, I turned around…and those suckers were frickin’ gone. So after tearing ass through the house. I found … Continue reading Where did I leave my Sh!t? →","og_url":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11","og_site_name":"Trendables","article_published_time":"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/images.quickblogcast.com\/7\/8\/5\/2\/3\/141704-132587\/lostandfound0.jpg?a=20"}],"author":"trend76ables","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"trend76ables","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/","name":"Trendables","description":"Bite-sized pieces of my mind","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11","url":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11","name":"Where did I leave my Sh!t? - Trendables","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00","dateModified":"2011-11-04T03:25:57+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/0b7ff358b01386db762262bca35109d6"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?p=11#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Where did I leave my Sh!t?"}]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/0b7ff358b01386db762262bca35109d6","name":"trend76ables","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1139cbbc9c76c818c558d356d8d6ca6eb8c8061a54de5a7d8f19c9c21ec72411?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1139cbbc9c76c818c558d356d8d6ca6eb8c8061a54de5a7d8f19c9c21ec72411?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"trend76ables"},"url":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/?author=1"}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trendables.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}